One of the best things I ever did for myself was to implement the following:
• When I walk into a room, I no longer wonder if they like me. I ask myself if I like them.
I got really good at this, and it was so freeing. I found myself going more places, doing more things, and enjoying myself more. I was no longer under an imaginary microscope being dissected and judged for my every move.
I also learned that if I’m not enjoying something, just stop.
• Just because I’ve been doing something a long time, doesn’t mean I have to do it for a lifetime.
Or the lifetime of whatever it is.
For instance, if I’m reading a book and I find I’m not that into it anymore but feel obligated to finish, I just put the book down. Nobody cares, and I shouldn’t either.
A personal downfall to all of this is that I have anxiety. Anxiety predisposes me to gear up for the worst-case scenario. It makes it hard for me to imagine that I might enjoy something, so then I decide I won’t before I even try.
Because, you know, put the book down.
If someone makes a compelling case and I can imagine myself liking it, then we’re all good, but most invitations don’t come with a detailed description complete with exit strategies.
Either way, I’ve found a freedom that allows me to do karaoke by myself or dance at a party without being drunk, and THAT makes me feel good.
Written 7.29.21
